Do Not Trade With Anyone, At All

"hey freddie, would you like an STD?" i said as i offered fred a hersey's kiss. Fred starred at me, wondering if i was crazy. "uhh.. no thanks.." i laughed "i didnt do anything to it, i swear. thats just what i use to call them in high school." Fred still had that confused look on his face. "how is a kiss like an STD? what do you call life savers?" i laughed, knowing he would definatly think i was crazy if i told him what i called life savers. "condems..." freds eyes got wide. i could tell he wasnt understanding what i was trying to say here. "no see, say you have this.. paper bag, okay? and in that paper bag you have life savers, smarties, dumm dumms, and kisses. the "life savers" are condems, get it? cuz they can save your life when your dealing with an STD. which, is a kiss. a smartie is "absinance". because your being "smart". and a dumm dumm is those people who go around having sex with whoever! you get what im saying?" fred starred at me more intensly "so, you mean- lifes like a giant paper bag?" i nodded my head "in a way.." he took the kiss from my hand "yes, i would love an STD. thank you." he tore the blue foil off the kiss and rolled it inbetween his thumb and index finger before throwing it to the ground. "this looks like a very delisous STD" he said before popping it into his mouth. "enjoy your STD!" i told him. he laughed "oh, i will."