❈ AXON HILLOCK ❈

^ cheyenne :) upon arriving to the apartment, that me and linda shared, i was confrounted by an angry and worried roommate. as i walked through the frount door and layed my leather jacket over the arm of the couch she starred at me. at first, she didnt say a word. as soon as she relized that i wasnt going to volonteerly explain to her what happend to me last night, she decitded to ask for herself. "what happend to you last night?!" she crossed her arms infrount of her chest. i didnt know where to begin. "well, i uh..... i told you what my intensions were...." i figured that starting at a true statement was the best way to go. "intensions?" i didnt like explaing things to linda for more than one reason. she can be very opinonionated... once, i told her that my cousin decided to be a hippie and move to san fransico to be with a man and his six other mistresses... and that didnt go over to well. not like thats what i did last night, or anything! but, ever since that insident, i dont like to explain things to linda. i dont want her to stand there and nag at me, like shes my fuckin mother! "yes, i told you that i was into that singer...remember?" i opened up the fridge and took out a soda. "no! you didnt!" she unhooked her arms from her chest and took away the soda that i was holding in my hand. "so you left me there? alone! in a bar with strangers! freaks! just so you can screw some singer!" i held in my laugh "oh, come on!" i reached to retrieve my soda. she pulled away "you- i cant belive you!" she set the soda on the counter behind her. "oh, dont be such a dramaqueen, linda! its not THAT bad!" "not that bad?" "stop that..." when you live with someone for three years, you start to learn things from them. unfortunatly, linda has picked up my trait of repeating points in arguments instead of how to relax. i took the soda from the couter and opend it before she could take it away again, as if the fact that the can was open made any difference. "Whatever!" she through up her hands and stormed off into her bedroom.

❈ A Little Dab Will Do Ya ❈

i was sitting on the bed waiting for tom to finish getting ready to start his day. the door to the master bathroom was wide open. i could see toms reflection in the mirror. i watched tom as he brushed some blush on his cheeks. "you wanna know something?" i asked. tom didnt look away from his reflection "hmmm?". "i cant belive it takes you twenty minuets to put your makeup on...." he closed the blush compact and set it near the sink. "i do not..." he examined his hair then fluffed it out more. "oh my god, tom! your hair is fine!" he laughed "okay okay okay! hold on! almost finished!" he reached over to the wooden shelf beside the mirror and took a bottle of "man perfume". he struggled to unwrap the plastic coating. "having trouble?" i asked. he bit into the side of the bottle "i almost got it! damn new bottle of- oh! got it!" he threw the plastic into the sink and sprayed the fragrence around his chest. "a little dab will do ya.." he whispered.

❈ Rock Paper Scissors ❈

i was sitting inbetween freddie and tom on the couch near the big window on the bus. eric had a bowl of popcorn on his lap that he was sharing with jeff. "yo eric!" freddie said. "what?" eric tried to say with a mouthfull of popcorn. "can you get me a poptart? pretty please!" freddie blinked his eyes exsessivly. eric starred at him "what? no way, man!" freddie hit the arm of the couch. "come on eric! you got your fat ass up to make yourself popcorn! be a pal and get me a poptart!" eric threw a handful of popcorn in fred's direction. most of it landed in his frizzy hair. fred shook out his hair "prick!" the tainted popcorn landed on the floor. "hey, you gonna pick that up, fred?" tom said, pointing to the pile of popcorn on the floor. "no! eric will after he gets me my poptart!" eric set the bowl of popcorn on jeffs lap "oh my fuckin god! lazy son of a bitch!" he got up from his seat and reached into the cabnit above his head. fred laughed "aww phank chu errrriic!" eric took down a box of poptarts and looked inside. "this is the last one." he informed fred. "damn! well, hand it over!" eric took the poptart out of the box. "hey! what if i wanted it.." i said, not really caring weather i got the last poptart or not. just for the entertainment of seeing fred complain. he starred at me "kayla....dont EVEN joke around like that!" tom laughed "come on fred, let her have the damn poptart!" fred tried reaching for the poptart in erics hand, but eric had already pulled it away. "rock paper scissors for it" he said. fred looked at me "what? no! its my poptart! now hand it over!" eric shook his head "you have to be fair fred!" jeff laughed "doesnt it come with two?" fred starred "so?" "well, just share it..." kindergardeners shared better than we did. sharing didnt exsist to us. "share?! i dont think so!" i held out my hand. "come on freddie, its not THAT bad.." eric stood infrount of us "okay! on its gonna go like this, on the count of three, shoot! okay? the classic 1,2,3 shoot!" freddie slowly held out his hand. "okay, 1" freddie watched my hand. "2" i watched his hand just as carefully. "3!" at that moment, me and freddie quickly dealt out our choises. freddie had paper, and i had rock. freddie lifted up his arms and yelled "boya!" he tried reaching for the poptart again. eric pulled it away for the second time. "best two out of three..." freddie started to get annoyed "no! i won fair and square! now give me the damn poptart!" i gave up "just let him have the poptart. i didnt really want it anyway, i was just kiddin." eric went back to his seat "you sure?" i nodded my head. eric through the poptart at freddie "there" fred opened the package "YEEESSSSS..." he put the package of poptarts up to his nose "strawberry!"

❈ Hide And Go Seek ❈

the last time i wore a skirt, i was 7 years old.. its been 9 years since then and this is my first time wearing a skirt. i starred the plastic chair that was connected to my desk. i have forgotton how to sit! i slowly eased my way into the chair and crossed my legs under the desk. after finding a comfortable position i saw the door swing open. fred slid across the tile floor in his high top reebok sneakers. he tossed me a metallic object. i caught it. i knew instantly what i was holding. this was the shirt that i had lost last night! i was late to school trying to look for it! "HOLY SHI- fred! where did you find it?!" i hid the shirt under the desk. "in the bus!" "what in the world was it doing there?!" fred laughed "i dont know!" he turned around and started to leave. "fred!!" he turned around "what? i gotta go!" i needed to ask him something.. but the whole class was watching. i wasnt going to talk to freddie about this insident in public.. "why? whats the rush?" he turned back around and opend the door "i gotta go! cya!" "freddie!!" he left the classroom. i quickly opened my backpack and shuvved the shirt in behind my history textbook.

❈ Dime ❈

cheyenne sat in the chair next to the window. her arms were crossed and she looked around the hotel room. she made sure not to look at me. thats when i wondered what was going on.. i was walking down the street to the bar when i got a call from cheyenne telling me turn around and go back to the hotel. nikki took my arm. "i want you to close your eyes, okay?" i shook my head "no.. i dont wanna close my eyes!" i screamed. he held on tighter to my arm. "hold still!" he wrapped a plastic tube around my arm and tied it in a knot. "what are you doooooing?" cheyenne crossed her legs and bounced one leg up on down, still not looking at me. nikki took a needle and jammed it into my arm. "WHAT ARE YOU DOING!!????!" "SHHH" he said, digging the needle deeper. i didnt know what was going on at that point. for some reason i started crying. nikki took the needle out of my arm and cut the plastic tube with his knife. cheyenne stood up "this wasnt a good idea, nikki! i take it back!" nikki layed me down on the bed "cheyenne, you cant take it back. she will be fine!" my head was spinning and i couldnt feel anything. i layed on the bed, still as a rock, starring up at the ceiling listening to them talk. "but what if she isnt?! oh my god, dont tell me thats gonna bruise! tom cant see that!!" "cheyenne, its OKAY! it will only leave a small mark, just put a band aid over it before you leave." i started to loose focus on the room. the ceiling was growing closer and the walls were moving closer. i didnt have the energy to scream nor move.

❈ Freddie The Biker ❈

"AHH guys, check this out!" fred yelled from around the corner. eric rolled his eyes "what now fred?" cheyenne hooked onto erics arm "eric, why are you in such a crabby mood?" Fred came around the corner with a bike. "really fred? a bike?" tom asked. jeff laughed "hey man! thats mine!" "really?" eric asked. "no!" fred sat on the leather seat. "ooo its like the seat is shaped for my butt! its perfect!" jeff laughed harder "what?" fred pulled the frount of the bike up by the handle bars and made "vroom vroom" noises. cheyenne laughed "freddie! what on earth are you doing?" tom laughed "he's playing!" fred put the frount tire back on the ground "will someone ride with me?" "where are they gonna sit? the handle bars?" i said sarcastically. freds face lit up "perfect! get on the handle bars!" jeff held his chest in laughing agony. "noooo. i am NOT sitting up there!" "why not?" first, i thought of how it was possiable to get up there in these heels. second, i bet i couldnt keep my balance. id flop off! "just- no!" "come on kayla, get on the bike!" eric said, hopeing to get some entertainment. "i wont let you fall!" fred added. "i dont see how this is funny." fred played with the breaks "come on kayla! it will be fun!" i looked over to tom. tom didnt have anything to say about this. fred caught me looking at tom. "tom! tell her that she can ride!" "i dont know fred.. she could hurt herself" see, even tom knowns im clumsy! im BOUND to fall off! "i wont let her fall! ill be real careful. ill go slow, not make sharp turns, and i wont brake hard!" tom thought "well i guess.." "tom!" if this was a few days ago, i would have been the first one to volonteer to sit on freddie's handlebars. now i dont want anything to do with him! "what? im sure fred wont bump you off just to see you break your neck!" fred smiled "of course not!" eric pushed me to the bike "just get on the damn bike, hard headed woman!" cheyenne laughed. i know eric jokes alot, but he can be a real pain in the ass! i looked at the bike. not knowing how to get on. "i have 1 problem.. how do i get on this thing?" fred laughed "just step on this bar and jump up." i looked at the thin metal bar "i dont think i can.." fred grabbed my waist "then we can do this. on the count of 2 jump." "why 2?" "its something different- just do it" "im gonna laugh if he misses! just like-picks her up and tryies to get her on the bike real quick, and he drops her a little to far to the left!" eric said. "shut up, eric! your gonna jinx it!" i yelled back. "2!" "hey! but-" before i knew it i was sitting on the handle bars. "oh...." he laughed "told ya it would work." "yeah, hes done this before" eric added. fred put his feet on the peddles. "okay! here we go!" "oh my god.." tom laughed "you will live!" "oh do you re-" before i could finish talking fred sped away. "oh my god!" i grabbed ahold of freds hands on the handle bars. he laughed "keep your balance, wouldnt want you to fall" "you WANT me to fall! thats your plan! you planted this bike there so you could kill me!" he laughed harder "relax! i dont want to kill you!" he pulled the breaks and the bike slid. i slid forward, just catching myself short of falling on freds lap. "I SWEAR TO FUCKIN GOD FRED!!" he laughed, liking the tourture he was causing me. "NOT FUNNY!" this only made him laugh harder. "relax!" i held on to his hands tighter. "see, isnt this fun!" "oh, tons!" i said sarcastically. we started moving again. the boyish smile on freds face made me laugh. "see, you ARE having fun!" a little part of me HATED this! i told myself that i would hate freddie, and never have ANYTHING to do with him EVER again! but the other little part was enjoying this.

❈ Back to Back ❈

this morning was the first time in history that tom has woken up before me. i put on one of toms t-shirts and went to find him. he was sitting indian style on the couch with the laptop on his lap. an empty bowl on ceral was laying on the coffee table ontop of a coaster. i sat next to tom. "whatcha doin?" i gave him a goodmorning kiss. "i was uh-looking at the website." "for what?" he pointed to an article "look what someone posted" i read threw the post that was written by someone who went by the name 'peach19'. "what are they talking about?" tom closed the laptop and set it on the arm of the couch "apprently im making out with eric wail i eat a peanut butter and jelly sandwhich.." he said it so naturally. "what?" he laughed "i dont know. crazy people who imagine me making out with eric." "i see." i looked down at the shirt i was wearing. i noticed the tag sticking out of the collar. "OH MY GOD!" tom looked at me "whats wrong?" i laughed at myself. tom just starred, wondering if i had gone nuts. "kayla?" i tucked my arms into the shirt. "I PUT MY SHIRT ON BACKWARDS! WOW! IM AN IDIOT!" he laughed as i pulled the frount of the shirt to my chest and slid my arms back threw the sleaves. "oh my god.." "i know! like- last month after i had spent the day going places, i noticed i had two different shoes on!" he laughed harder. "i have NEVER met anyone as ditzy as YOU!" "i get it from my mother.." he puts his arm around me and kissed my cheek. "dork.."

❈I See The Devil And Hes Lookin At Me ❈

" Look in the mirror, what do i see? i see the devil and hes lookin at me! " ~ LA Guns { Nikki } My last look at cheyenne was the view as she was walking out of my house. i could have done a better job talking to her if the guys weren't here. they ruined everything! i looked over to tommy. he was spread out across the floor. he layed on his arms as he starred at the light fixture. "yo t-bone! dont tell me you snorted all of this!" he didn't bother to look at me "vince did it!" vince was sitting on the couch with his pants around his ankles, drinking a bottle of rum. my own house then became to crowded. i threw my bottle of jack across the room. it hit the wall and shattered on the floor. "get out of my house! now! all of you!" tommy sat up and said "no way man!" i screamed and pulled out my hair "get out of my fuckin house!" mick was the first to get up and leave. vince and tommy just starred at me. i pulled out more of my hair and screamed louder "out of my fuckin house you bastards!!" i grabbed vince's bottle of rum out his hands and threw it through the t.v. i had to show them that i really meant buisness. they then rolled their eyes and walked out of my house. i took out of my secret stash, hidden in the post of my bed, and crawled into my closet. from there, the night was going to be spent hiding from little green men and swat teams.

❈Round & Round ❈

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gYHx7KnuUFA juan, the frizzy haired bassist, remindes me so much of jeff... the extreame jeff! like- the way they dance is similar, and their hair is frizzy... right? { jeffers } i was the first one to wake up this morning. like every morning, i first ate a bowl of orange slices wail i starred out the window of the moving bus. the last sign i saw said "Sierra Vista". if i remember correctly, i would say that we are in arizona. we played 8 shows in california this week. we are leaving california to go to jacksonville flordia. playing 4 shows there, then driving to seattle. after seattle, i dont know where we go. destinations are so hard to keep track of when your traveling by bus. with airlines, if you are going out of the country they warn you about the different laws and tell you if you have any drugs on you, you better get rid of them QUICK! on the bus, they just tell us what time the bus is leaving and that we better get our ass's on the bus before it leaves! i only know where we are going because robin keeps me updated. she ripped out an article from a magizine that listed all our dates and when we would be in what part of the country. she keeps me informed. i dont feel bad for giving the guys the silent treatment. why should i? i didnt have to tell them that i married robin for them to judge the whole idea! they gave me shit like "you cant love someone if you have only known them for a few months! it takes years!" come on tom, its not the fuckin 50s! that may have been the case 30 years ago, but times are changing. its perfectly okay to run off with your girlfreind and elope in vegas! its a common thing now-a-days. tom is just to old fashioned to notice things like that. "your to young!" another common thing kids do now-a-days is get married before they turn 30! i dont see a problem with that. im 25, and robin is 23. i mean- its not like i knocked her up and im being forced to marry her! im doing it because i love her! sure, when tom said all of this, he wasnt nessasarily pointing it towards me. he was going on about someone named jack and jill. if thats the way he REALLY feels about it, then im as sure as hell not gonna tell him the truth! not until he accepts the fact that there is nothing wrong with it! its his problem! if he wants to know so bad, then he needs to get over the whole "i love lucy" type of family crap! which, i cant stand! lucy is such a cry baby.. if i were rick, i would want to fuckin ship her off to Nova Scotia!

❈ If I Could Turn Back Time ❈

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mEszTzdUMcY The discovery was made when i noticed Nikki Sixx Talking to peter, Jeff's new guitar tech. When i saw Nikki, i ran to find Cheyenne. I had to tell her to watch her back. Whos knows what can happen if She runs into him! "Cheyenne! we have a problem!" i was running out of breath. i had run around the entire back stage area twise, looking for her! she starred at me like i was crazy. "what are you talking about?" i took my time trying to get my breath back. she waited. "okay! cheyenne, nikki is here! i just saw him talking to peter!" she didnt awnser me at first. she starred right past me. "cheyenne! helllooo! we have a problem here!" "yeah! i heard you the first time!" "so what are you gonna do?!" she looked around. " i dont know! does eric know he's here?" "want me to ask!?" i said sarcastically. she glared at me "your not helping!" "well, all i can say is, HIDE!" she shook her head "im not going to hide! im going to talk to him!" "nooo your not!" tom came up to us. "hey girls." cheyenne smiled "hey tom. just in time, i was just leaving." i grabbed her arm before she could walk off. "no! she wasnt. she was actually just telling me that she is gonna spend the ENTIRE night right by my side! isnt that right cheyenne?" she pulled away from my grip. "no!" she walked away. "damn it!" tom starred at me. "is something wrong?" "of course not. what could possiably be wrong?" he changed the subject. "you know, motley crue is suppost to be here tonight." i acted like i didnt already know "oh really? why is that?" "apparently they are doing this drug thing to." i tried to change the subject, but it didnt go as smoothly. "where did you get that hat?" tom adjusted his hat. "i found it in one of our wardrob cases." at that moment i heard "hey bear!" i turned around to see vince neil. tom pointed to vince "do you know him?" of course, tom knew vince, but i wasnt suppost to. vince came up and pushed me against the wall. too shocked to react, i followed along as he stuck his tonuge down my throat. he grabbed my hair and pulled it back. soon enough i felt him being dragged away. tom them pushed him aside and punched him in the face. i stood there, watching. not knowing what the right thing to do was. after vince stormed off, tom turned to me "what the fuck was that?!?!" "he has fucking issues!!" i was just as suprised and pissed as tom. "how do you know him? why did he call you bear?!" "look- if i tell you, you CAN NOT tell eric! promise me!" he shook out his hand "that fucker has a fuckin hard head!" "tom! listen!" he rubbed the hand he hit vince with as i told him what had happend. he starred at me for a good 5 minuetes before he said ".....................your not serious?" "tom! this IS serious!" he laughed at me "kayla.." "what!!" i had a hard time trying to explain, and now hes laughing at me! this is cheyennes problem, not mine! yet im involved! damn her..

❈ Once Upon A... ❈

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Eric has been talking about this girl that he met at the scout bar for a few weeks now. if i remember correctly, her name is Cheyenne. i try to ignore him talking about her as much as i can. its really annoying to hear nothing but things about some girl out of eric. Tom told eric that he wanted to meet this Cheyenne girl. At first eric was excited, but as it grew closer to the day, he grew more nervous. it was obvioiuse. eric would try to pospone the meeting by saying things like "i have a dentist opoitment on friday.. we cant do it!" and tom would come back with "cancel it. you knew we had plans this friday. we are going to meet your girlfriend, weather you like it or not." soon enough, friday arrived. i wasnt too excited to meet this girl. i barley knew eric. i would say i have only known for a month at the most. i didnt know if he was the type of guy who played girls, was just in it for the sex, or he actually was in it for the relationship. i had no clue! but it couldnt be that great of a relationship. they met at a bar, got drunk and had sex all in the same night. the very same night in which they met for the first time! but, who am i to judge. been there, done that. she could be a sweet girl who just got a little out of hand. or a slut that obviously didnt get far enough. in my head, i pictured cheyenne to be a tall, tan dark haired model from some forgien country. i thought that type of girl would look cute with eric. I mean- most rock starts DO date models.. i imagined her to be prissy with an attitude. maybe irish or german. a girl who was able to hold down her beer. possably with a weak accent. when Cheyenne walked threw the door, i saw the oppisate. her blonde hair layed against her pale skin. she didnt look she has hit the 5'5 mark on a tape measure. she stood in the doorway with her skin tight pants and leather boots. her makeup was dark but polished. she slouched as she stood. her posture lacked in her back. seeing her stand next to eric was comical. eric being just about a foot taller than her made it seem like she was shorter than she really was. too busy judging her apperance and not paying enough attension to relize that anyone was talking, tom nudged me with his elbow "kayla, this is cheyenne. say hi." "huh?" i snapped out of it and said "oh, hey. im kayla. tom's girlfreind. its nice to meet you. should be great to have a girl around here for once." trying my best to be polite, because thats how much of a good person i am. when she spoke, i relized that she didnt have an accent. her voice was deeper than i thought it would be. her laugh echoed through the room. it was loud and sometimes contained a few snorts. some would call it obnoxious, but it reminded me of my grandmothers laugh, her's also being very loud. it sounded like she didnt hold back when she laughs. she lets it all out. a real hearty type of laugh.

❈ Love Is A Battlefield ❈

tom reached for the horn. "tom! dont honk at them! thats rude!" he stopped just before hitting the horn on the sterring wheel. "but kayla! they wont move the fuck out of my way! this asshole infrount of me is pissing me off! he needs to move his ass! pick a direction-fucking dickhole!" he slammed his back into the seat and took a deep breath. "tom, whats your hurry?" "FUCK! see, i TOLD you we wouldnt make this light!" he put the car in park. "i just want to get there before your uncle leaves." "my uncle is there?" "thats what your dad said.." jeff rolled down his window and stuck his head out the window. "its so stuffy in here" eric put his arm around cheyenne and asked "why do we have to go to your grandmothers? this is fuckin stupid!" fred turned to eric and awnsered "because she invited us." "exactly! and you guys like going to my grandmothers..." i added. "its okay eric. we can go in her hot tub!" cheyenne made sure to get a point in. "and my aunt is making our secret family recipie for macoroni and cheese." eric then accepted it. "fine. i guess it wont be THAT bad.. lets just not stay more than a few hours." "FINALLY!" tom took the car out of park and set it in drive. "i SWEAR, if we dont make this light, im going to fucking get out of this car and beat the shit out of this person infrount of me!" i have never witnessed tom's road rage... and i gotta say, its pretty gnarly. as the light turned yellow, tom sped up to past the light. "WOO! we made it!" "congratiluations" fred said. tom turned on the radio. "107.5 tenessee's classic hit station. music from the 70s and 80s. pat benetar right now with 'love is a battlefield'." when the song started tom turned it up. i watched as he hummed the words. fred laughed at the exspression on my face. i found it WEIRD to see tom hummng the words. also, the fact that he KNEW the words. fred soon started singing and moving around in his seat. jeff kept his head out the window, trying to ignore what was happening inside the car. cheyenne was the next to sing along. eric tried to sing along, but messed up on the words. he soon gave up. i sat in the passenger seat, wanting to laugh and crawl into the glove box all at the same time! it was cute to see them singing to a pat benetar song, but it was discusting to see them singing it.. you know?

❈ Twins ❈

The band and i were in the record company lounge waiting to speak to ray. we entertained ourselfs with the world magizines on the wooden table next to the couch. eric flipped through the pages of an african culture magizine. he came to a page with an interesting picture and stopped. he laughed to himself. "look!" he showed the picture to us and pointed at a person in some sort of weird feather-like tribal cloack. their face was painted white with black markings around the eyes. the lips were oddly misshapen. the hair went to their hips and was dyed a white. the hair just about stood straight out. fred starred at the photograph. "what is that? is that a person?" eric laughed "i dont know!" he read the selection out loud "blah blah blah african tribal ceramony. blah blah blah headress of white. blah. yes. yes it is a person, fred." eric looked closer at the picture. "it looks like kayla!" fred laughed and clapped his hands together. tom was now interested. "let me see that!" he took the magizine away from eric and looked at the photograph. "it does not!" eric laughed harder. "give that back! i found it first!" he grabbed the magizine away from tom and continued "of course it looks like kayla! look at the hair! they are identical!" i rolled my eyes. for adults, they acted more like junior high students. eric flipped through a few more pages. he laughed "no! i change my mind! this looks more like kayla! this is like- her twin!" he pointed to a picture of a cow eating the grass of an abondaned feild. "very funny eric!" tom said as he grabbed the magizine away for the second time. "enough of this. its getting annoying!" he closed the magizine and threw it back onto the table. "now i want you guys to just sit there- like good little kids- and wait for ray!" tom crossed his arms and watched the hallway. eric stretched. his arms flew up in the air and then stretched behind his back. "oh my god..im so tired!"

❈ Got A Feeling Like A Train Is Running Through My Head ❈

i was cramped in a tiny space between the side of the couch and the metal wall of the bus. cheyenne was behind me, probly worse off. "cheyenne, can i go now?! i want to see tom!" he pinched the back of my shoulder "no! not yet! wait until they get far enough so they cant kick us off!" hiding in the back lounge of my husbands tour bus was probly one of the best ideas i have had in a few months! you know, besides getting in a car accident and spending two weeks in the hospital! we could hear every word that the guys were saying from the frount of the bus. "why couldn't i have had FIVE more seconds with her! im not gonna see her for over a year!" tom complained to jeff. "you can call her." "i cant kiss her through the phone!". i tried my hardest not to laugh, but a little giggle slipped out of my mouth. cheyenne whispered "shut up!" i covered my mouth and tried harder not to let out another giggle. "one day you will see." tom said. "right.." jeff started to loose interest in the convorsation. "tom, your not gonna spend the whole tour talking about your wife-are you?" eric mumbled. "NO!" as if tom was really proving to anyone that he wouldnt talk about me for a majority of the tour. i whispered to cheyenne "can i go now?!" she pushed me forward "sure. go on! remember the plan!" i crawled out of the tight space and took a deep breath. i quietly and slowly walked into the frount of the bus. tom's back was facing me so it was the perfect chance for a suprise. i snuck up behind him and put my hands around his eyes "guess who!" he threw my hands off his eyes and turned around "kayla!" he hugged me. i was glad that he was excited. i would have thought that he would have been pissed and kicked me off the bus, even though we are 30 minuetes away from the house. jeff starred at us "what the fuck are you doing here?!" eric yelled. tom let go of me "hey, this wasnt my idea. so dont blame me! im just glad she's here" jeff looked around the bus. "where's robin?" he waited for robin to jump out of a cabnit any moment. "she- uh.. didnt come." his face sunk. "dont tell me cheyenne came along?" fred said. i tried to change the subject before eric could start talking shit "i had to climb up the bus to get in here! threw the hatch!" i pointed up to the ceiling of the bus where a hatch was convenienly placed. eric ignored what i had said and went on about cheyenne. "im not suprised she wouldn't come, why would she want to confrount me when we are fighting? since, if her being here would give us another chance to talk about it, and maybe make it better. this is sooo like her!" the plan wasn't for eric to talk shit. "dont be like that eric. of course she wants to be here with you!" "then why isnt she here?" i couldn't give in until cheyenne came out the back lounge. i had to think of something else to say! "well, would you want her to be here?" stupid question. "yes.." cheyenne came out the back lounge. "cheyenne!" cheyenne crossed her arms infrount of her chest. "cheyenne?" "Eric! i cant belive you! you dont want me here!" eric got confused "thats not what i said. i said i DID want you here!" "but you didnt sound like it!" i should have known that this would happen. i sat on the couch next to tom and watched them fight. "how did i not sound like it?!" jeff mumbed "bus sweet bus..."

❈ Pretty Please? ❈

, Cyndi asked me to film In the summer of 1985 i was living with my aunt Cyndi in Saratoga Springs, New York. Cyndi Barnes worked as a entertainment reporter for the local news station. She agreed to let me live in her small one story, two bedroom, brick house as long as i work as an intern for her station. it was my job to do things like pick up a tray of coffee's from the shoppe across the street, charge the batteries in the camera's, and restock the brekfast table. Carson, who films Cyndi on locationae was fired this morning. To avoid stress and wasting time, the cinderella concert at the SPAC. She bribed me with the obvious- backstage passes, money, and favor's. I rolled the camera as Cyndi stood infrount of the bands dressing room enterance. "tonight, at the SPAC, cinderella will be preforming. cinderella has been known to provide a spectacular stage show! their show tonight starts at 8:30 pm. im Cyndi Barnes of 11 news and i will continue with updates on tonight's cinderella show." i stopped the camera and handed it to her. "am i done now?" she turned off her microphone and took out her ear peice. "for now. we go live in a few hours." the dressingroom door opened and a tall, dark, curly haired fellow dressed in leather pants and a blue silk shirt walked out. he accidently hit my aunt with he door as he was opening it. "oh, im sorry ma'm." i didnt know who this man was, but his apperance blew my mind! i have never seen anything like him- only in magizines or on t.v. "excuse me, are you tom keifer?" Cyndi asked. He looked down at the microphone and camera that she was holding. "tom keifer? no, ive never heard of him." Cyndi saw past his lie. "if i can just get one interview with-" tom interupted her "look- im sorry. but im not giving any interviews tonight." "but i am Cyndi-" "i dont care who you are, or who you work for. im sorry. excuse me, im busy." he walked passed my aunt and continued down the hall. "can you belive him? i hate celebrites!" i was growing more curious about this tom keifer character. "i can get you that interview!" i said before i could even think it through. "what? kayla, your only an intern!" "i know! but i can do this. just- i got this, i promise!" before she gave me permission, i was off. i ran down the hall in my mini skirt and stiletto heels looking for tom. i saw tom walk into a room. i slowed down to catch my breath. this would be a good time to come up with a plan. i could go in there, go up to tom and DEMAND an interview! i could put on a big cheesy smile and ask nicely, maybe throw in a pretty please if i needed to. or i could go with my last resort, begging! i was pacing up and down the hallway, to scared to go in and talk to him. i tried to build up some courage. "you can do this! you got this! do this for your aunt! if she gets this interview, she could get a promotion! what are you freaking out about?! tom is just a normal guy, he is just like the rest of them!" i decided to just do it! i will walk in, and there is no turning back. i took a deep breath and entered the room. a heavy mist covered me as soon as i entered. the room was humid and made me sweat. my eyes were irritated and could only make out this figure in frount of me. "tom? are you in here?"my eyes were slowly staring to get use to the mist. i felt someone grab my hand. "tom? is that you?" my eyes now had full vision. i relized that i was in a shower room. the mist was hot water evaporating from the line of running showers. i watched as tom kissed my neck and pulled me closer. this is a better way to get an interview than asking him "pretty please".

❈ Basket Case ❈

i let fred take a shower in my house today. he came over this morning telling me the story of how his shower fell through the floor in the bathroom. i didnt understand how that was possiable, but leave it up to freddie to figure it out. tom was at the studio finishing up some tracks. so i didnt see a problem with fred using our shower for a quick second. he used the shower in our master bathroom. i layed on the bed going threw some mail. fred came out of the bathroom with a towel wrapped around his waist. his chest was glistening. his wood anicent symbol necklace layed on his bare chest. because im married to tom, i wouldnt say that i was STARRING, i was merely observing that a naked man was standing before me. "fred, where are your clothes?" he shook his hair out "i forgot to bring them... do you think i can borrow some from tom? i'll bring them back tommorow! i promise! i'll even wash them... maybe.." "yeah yeah. just get something out of the closet right there." he opened the closet door and looked around for the light switch. "uhh kayla, where is the light?" "you see that basket in the middle of the closet? full of clothes?" "yeah.." "well stand on that. and twist the lighbulb to the left." "your kidding me right... you want me to stand on that basket, and turn on the lightbulb?" "yes.." i took my attension away from fred and consintrated back on the pile of mail i had scattered across my bed. the next thing i know, i hear the closet door slam open and fred fall out on the floor! the basket flew out of the closet, and clothes spilt out all over the floor. fred's towel was laying ontop of the basket. my attension was now brought to a fully naked, dripping wet, man laying on my floor. fred jumped up and laughed at himself. when he relized me starring me at him, he figured out that his towel feel off. the look on his face as he searched the clothes pile for his towel was PRICELESS! as i died of laughter, freddie died of embarassment. when he found his towel he wrapped it back around his waist. "im just.. i'll be back!" fred left the room. i swear.. SOMETIMES...

❈ Desk Sex ❈

Some of the bands that work for the label were schedualed by ray to attend a meeting held by his nephew drew. we werent told what the subject of the meeting was. i had the feeling that it may be bad when tom told me that I had to come along..im not part of the band. im his WIFE! i dont work for the company either. i just show up in the studio every now and again to bring tom his lunch or pick him when he has late nights, or keep him company when he's working alone. we walked into this room with white and brown stripped wallpaper. there was a chalk board hanging on the wall in the frount of the room. a few feet away is where nine rows of desks began. it looked like a classroom, but full of heavy metal freaks. who im guessing to be drew, was standing behind a little desk that he pulled aside for himself. we sat in the very back, closest to the door. we sat like children in our wood desks watching to door to see what kind of person would walk in next. hoping that maybe some of our freinds would be in the same class. as the classroom started to fill up the room got louder. fred was showing off his new boots to jeff. eric was sitting in the desk across from me, carving "FUCK" in the desk with a broken paperclip. tom layed his head on the desk and rested. i sat there, in my seat and waited for whatever was gonna happen, to end. the man behind the small desk up frount stepped over to the chalkboard and introduced himself. "my name is drew perma. ray, the man who owns your company, is my uncle. i work as a counsolar for children, teenagers, and adults. i specilaize in marriage, social and mental counsaling. ray has asked me to tell all of you, some important aspects of everyday life. i know that all you are in "big bad" rock n roll bands. you all make tons of money, get alot of chicks, probly do a lot of drugs. the typicall rock star. am i right?" everyone in the room starred at this red headed boy with frekels that stood before us. he didnt look older than 25. his tie was loose, his shirt was'nt tucked in and he wore nikes... this is a waste of time. ive known ray to be PRETTY stupid.. but i think this tops it. we dont need counsaling.. we dont need to be told what we are doing wrong in life. im not doing ANYTHING wrong! drew picked up a peice of chalk and spoke to us as he wrote on the board. "first off. let me tell you about-" "why the fuck is ray having us do this?!" a guy sitting across the room said. drew stopped writing and walked over to him. "because apparntly, all of you have problems" i raised my hand. its not polite to shout out.. i learned THAT MUCH from school. drew looked in my direction. "yes ms?" "is MRS. and i dont see why WE are here? we dont have as big of problems as some of the other bands that come through here. and if your suppost to be "teaching" us, then does that mean we are gonna have to come to this hell hole more than today? cuz i sw-" eric kicked my chair. drew laughed "calm down.. we are just gonna do an activity, and i hope all of you will learn something and apply this to your everyday life.." "right..." drew finished writting on the board. he backed away from the board and explained what he had wrote. "im going to blow up this beach ball. on this beach ball is words, emotions, anything you can think of! im going to TOSS this ball to someone. when they catch it, look on where your LEFT thumb is. i want you to then describe a time that you felt that way. got it?" drew tossed a pink beach ball to a guy in the frount row. he sat there, with the beach ball in his hands, starring at drew. "your not for real... are you?" drew looked where his thumb was. "oooo good one! you got angry. now tell us of a time you were angry!" he guy gave drew a straight face. it looked like he was amazed at how stupid drew was! drew is related to ray.. it cant be THAT suprising.. "well, your pissing me off right now! i dont want to do this shit!" he threw the ball across the room. it hit some other guy in the face and bounced off on freds desk. fred picked it up "WOO! my turn! ooo! i got silly! i always feel silly!" everyone in the room starred at fred. "okay.. a time when i felt silly.. hmmm.. OOO! i got a good one! there was this one time-" eric took the ball away from fred. "hey! give it back eric! wait your turn!" eric looked at the ball and didnt hesitate to pop it with the paperclip. fred gasped. "ERIC!" eric threw the deflated ball on my desk. "there!" drew's face dropped. "i-uhh.. lets move on to the next activity then!" the class moaned and whined. i set my feet on the legs of toms chair infrount of me. i bounced my legs up and down so that it moved his desk. he didnt lift up his head. i shook harder, watching tom go up and down in his seat. "kayla, stop dry humping the desk!" eric said. "im not humping the desk! im shaking tom! look at his jacket move! i mean- there is a differnce!" "not for you there isnt.." "VERY FUNNY!"

❈Bumper Stickers ❈

i was searching throught the closet in our bedroom to find my red pumps. i JUST saw them yesterday, and now they have gone missing! i scattered shit all over the floor trying to look for them! tom walked in and looked at the mess i created. "kayla! WHAT in the world-" "tom, i have no time to talk! i have to find my red pumps! i cant find them anywhere!" i threw more shoes out of the closet "these are all YOURS!" "what do you need those shoes for? whats wrong with those ones?" he points to a pair of black and white poka dotted wedges. "tom! i cant wear those!" "why not?" "you know just as well as i do that you cant mix patterns! im wearing stripes!" he laughed "well, where was the last place you saw them?" "YESTERDAY! right HERE! but they arnt here anymore!" he sat beside me on the floor and looked into the closet. "Damn, well uh.. i dont know babe. sorry" "sorry?!" he stood up "yeah, nothing i can do." "but-" "just change into a solid color, or poka dots." "UH!" i pushed all the shoes back into the closet. "kayla..i hope your not keeping it like that.." "of course not!" i picked up my poka dotted wedges and put them on. "where are you going anyway?" tom asked. "gonna check the mail" ".....................really?" i took the keys from the dresser and walked out of the house.

❈ Toast ❈

{wedding toast by eric } eric: okay, ive been in a band with tom here for.. i wanna say 5 years? maybe more, maybe less. so, ive known this fucker for awhile. im his best man. and the only thing i can think of to say is..congratultions and may all your ups and downs be inbetween the sheets. or, im some cases, in the back seat of taxi's. *Drinks

❈ Billion Dollar Babies ❈

when i found the time to look at my phone i had noticed that my voicemail was full, and i had 57 missed calls from.. all from tom. i sat on my bed and listened to the voicemails. the first ones started like "kayla, i NEED to talk to you! PLEASE dont do this! call me..please.." there was about 11 of those messages. those messages soon turned into "damn it kayla! i cant belive your not calling me! this is pissing me off! CALL ME!" from that, it went back to "kayla....im sorry.. i REALLY am! and i can explain EVERYTHING to you if you just call me.. kayla.." i earased all the messages and layed my phone on my stomache. i layed in the bed that cheyenne and eric had set up for me in the guest bedroom. this room only had one wide window behind the bed. the bedpost covered most of it, limiting the light it let into the room. i am convinced that i am more heartbroken then tom... i mean-we were getting married in 2 WEEKS! 14 days til our wedding! i walk backstage to see him all over some girl! he exspects me to "listen" that its "not what it looks like" and we "NEED to talk"! there is NOTHING that can make any of this better.. it was hard for me just to give up that ring! i was sooooo excited to marry tom! i was fucking blinded! nothing else mattered to me, except for tom and our wedding! then to be CRUSHED like i was, that fast! just BAM! its killing me.. then the fact that toms not giving up on this.. it would be better if he just left me alone so i can forget about this.. i need to move on now.. and i cant do that when- my phone started vibating on my stomache. i picked it up and looked to see who was calling. the caller id showed a picture of me and tom in hawii. uh.. tom is calling.. AGAIN! i decided to awnser the phone. maybe i could tell him to STOP calling..

❈ Taxi ❈

gonna try something different here! cuz im DANGEROUS! eric: tom! where the fuck where you!?! your LATE! tom: *histerical laugh. look! we got kicked out of a taxi! we had to walk here! kayla: tom.. jeff: kicked out of a taxi? for what? tom: *laugh. oh-okay! soooo, what happend was- kayla: tom! dont! tom: *laughs eric: am i missing something? fred: your not the only one.. kayla: it was toms fault! tom: you didnt have to go along with it! jeff: what did you do? kayla: we got the ONLY non-creeper taxi driver in tenessee! fred: non-creeper? tom: well we pretended like we were having sex in the back of the taxi, and he kicked us out. jeff: why pretend? since your already back there, why not do it? tom: i didnt think of that... fred: not suprised eric: so you walked here? kayla: yes! jeff: lets get to practice tom: can you give me like- 10 minuetes? i WALKED here! eric: you get 2 tom: COME ON! fred: no! get your scronny ass behind the mic! tom: hey! its not scronny..

❈There’s Too Much Blood In My Caffeine System ❈

tom tells me that his mother is trying to ruin our engagement.. look- i ONLY broke her fucking clock! you know, it was on the wall behind the fucking front door! when you open that door, your gonna hit that clock! i just so happened to be the first person to do that... and brake it.. and it wasn't even that nice of a clock! it was only custom made in Germany.. if that's why she hates me, I'm screwed. if its something like "oh! some woman is taking away my son! I'm not ready for this! *weep " then i think i can fix that. all i would have to do is talk to her, right? so i made a decision to talk to her during dinner.. which, did NOT go as well as i planned. toms mother is... well, prissy, bitchy, the typicall stuck up, know it all, thinks shes better than everyone else type of person. she insisted on making dinner with out any help. so when she called everyone in for dinner, she made sure that me and tom didn't sit next to each other. may i make sure this is clear... WE ARE IN MINE AND TOMS HOUSE! her, her husband, and her daughter broke into our house to surprise us when we came home from Hawaii. she insists on staying with us until our wedding. so there we are, picking seats at the dinner table. tom sits down in the middle of the right side of the table, and i grab the chair next to him. his mom comes up and says "no. no. no. i think you would be more comfortable over there." she points to the seat across from tom with a fork. "but i was kin-" "don't argue young lady." i looked over to tom. he didn't say anything, not that i didn't understand why. i took my hand off the chair and walked around the table and sat in between Georgeanna and her father. tom's mother sat in the chair next to him. i have not practiced or even thought about what i was going to say, but i knew i had to say SOMETHING. so i thought i would start off by asking tom about his day. "soo tom, how was work?" he looked up from his plate "eh, same ol' same ol'." i tryed harder. "so it didn't go very good?" he laughed "nah, it was actually pretty good. we cut the guitars for a song, played some pool and made a plan for tomorrow." i nodded my head "cool". his mother watched me like a fucking hawk! i felt awkward.. and my mind went blank. i couldn't think of anything else to say. instead i just pushed food around on my plate. "its very disrespectful to play with your food. exspecially when i spent hours making it for you." his mother said. i looked over to tom, who was drinking out of his soda can. "right.." i put my fork on the plate. "I'm not very hungry.. i-uh actually had a big lunch.." Georgena noticed my engagement ring. she picked up my hand and ran her fingers along the diamond "is this the ring!?" she asked me. i looked over to tom's mother. she watched. "uhh-yeah! its beautiful, isn't it!" "gorgeous!" she put my hand down and said to tom "you did a better job than i thought!" he set his can back down on the table and nodded his head. i think tom is annoyed by his family being here. i don't blame him. ( thought of this wail i was starring out my window. i saw a hobo carrying a box full of crumbled up newspaper, and somehow this popped into my head..)

❈ Solute VS Solvent ❈

inspired by chemistry with Mr. Horstmeyer. hes 23 and recently got married. so i thought what happend today in class was INSANLY cute! { ERIC } the band was hanging around in toms garage. i twirled my bass around my neck. fred asked "does that like- take a lot of practice?" i shrugged my shoulders. "i guess- i mean, it doesnt take THAT long.." he laughed "what? you go home to cheyenne everynight and go 'hey honey! watch this! look what i can do!' and twirl your fuckin bass around?" the thought of cheyenne back in my life made me happy. it felt so amazing to be around her again! tom laughed "dude! look! he's blushing!" the guys all laughed. "shut the fuck up! i am not!" "awwwww! does eric love his girlfriend?" jeff said. it made me blush more. "awwww eric!" "shut up fred! all of you! i mean it!" i put my bass down on the stand and sat down on the couch. "not cool!" they stopped laughing "yeah yeah, whatever eric. we know the truth!" i laughed a little at myself.

❈ Frito Burrito? ❈

i was sitting up against the opposite wall from the door to the recording studio eating fritos. i was waiting for tom to finish up so we can go to dinner. after 20 minuetes of waiting, i decited to go the vending machine and spend a dollar on a bag of fritos. i dont think ive met anybody who loves fritos.. i dont even like fritos, but thats all they had. so i dumped a handful of fritos into my palm and picked at them slowly. i watched people walk by wail i shuvved a frito into my mouth. the studio door opened. i looked up, hoping it would be tom. "hey kayla!" fred said as he sat on the floor next to me. "hey fred.." i took another frito out of my palm and looked at it. fred whispered "everywhere i look i see bret michaels, starring at me..." my shirt had a black and white picture of bret michaels where the color was his blue eyes. i whispered back "im sorry." he laughed "nah, im kiddin'." i asked "sooo, when is tom leaving?" "i dont know. all i know is that i eat dinner at 9." "do you want some fritos?" he looked the pile in my hand "nah. do you want a mint?" "no thanks.." he took a mint out of his pocket. it was crushed and some dust layed on the bottom of the clear wrapper "damn..." he shuvved the mint back into his pocket and stood up. "well, have a good day." he left.