(not in the mood to write, but i have to write something.. sorry its crappy nonsense)
I don't understand how Tom could be so jealous of Freddie. for one; we are Married. Tom has that advantage over Freddie. i love Tom. Two; Fred may be more adventurous, cute, and funny than tom, but i don't think that's worth breaking his heart over. It was obvious when Fred would say things like "she's funny AND beautiful!" or "anything you want, gorgeous.", that it pissed Tom off. i think that's why Fred says those things. Not that he means it, but the fact that it aggravates Tom. Fred always claims to be such a "good friend" to tom. but the fact is, if he was REALLY a good friend, he shouldnt even be "flirting" with me. So, Fred isnt as good of a friend as he thinks.
Saturday, May 7, 2011
Wednesday, May 4, 2011
Apple Doesnt Fall Far From The Tree..
( I found this old writting shuvved in the back of a folder.. its not even finished )
When the bus pulled into the parking lot of the first hotel, the question "where do the girls sleep?" arose. since, sneeking on the bus with no contract forbids us to even be here in the first place, the hotel wouldnt let us in. tom kept me company outside the hotel building. i stood against the west wall and smoked a ciggeratte. Tom sat on the curb. "tom, how am i suppost to get in there? they wont let me past the door!" he flipped his phone open, then closed. open, then closed. "i dont know.. what do you think eric and cheyenne are going to do?" he asked me. "he's probly going to have her sleep in the bus..." he starred at me. "but, of course, YOU dont want to sleep in the bus." "im not sleeping in the bus!"
When the bus pulled into the parking lot of the first hotel, the question "where do the girls sleep?" arose. since, sneeking on the bus with no contract forbids us to even be here in the first place, the hotel wouldnt let us in. tom kept me company outside the hotel building. i stood against the west wall and smoked a ciggeratte. Tom sat on the curb. "tom, how am i suppost to get in there? they wont let me past the door!" he flipped his phone open, then closed. open, then closed. "i dont know.. what do you think eric and cheyenne are going to do?" he asked me. "he's probly going to have her sleep in the bus..." he starred at me. "but, of course, YOU dont want to sleep in the bus." "im not sleeping in the bus!"
Tuesday, May 3, 2011
Flirting, Strike 2
I am not quite sure how i should react to the situation that i had gotten myself into.
I talked to Tom last night about how he has been acting lately. It was just what i expected. Tom was jealous of Freddie again. This time, he explained why. "because! he flirts with you, a LOT. and you flirt back!" i never thought of it as "flirting"... i was just trying to show my affection towards Freddie with out doing anything TOO harmful. "i don't FLIRT with Freddie!" was it that noticeable? "yes you do.." okay, so i DO flirt with Freddie.. "...." There was no point in denying it. not only would i get in trouble for flirting with Fred, but i would be a lier. "... I'm going to bed. you can join me.. but you have better things to do." oh, make me feel GUILTY! god tom, you kill me. "no! don't act like that. I'm coming with you." "good." good? that was it? "I'm sorry.." he deserved an apology. its not his fault- well, not ENTIRELY his fault..
I talked to Tom last night about how he has been acting lately. It was just what i expected. Tom was jealous of Freddie again. This time, he explained why. "because! he flirts with you, a LOT. and you flirt back!" i never thought of it as "flirting"... i was just trying to show my affection towards Freddie with out doing anything TOO harmful. "i don't FLIRT with Freddie!" was it that noticeable? "yes you do.." okay, so i DO flirt with Freddie.. "...." There was no point in denying it. not only would i get in trouble for flirting with Fred, but i would be a lier. "... I'm going to bed. you can join me.. but you have better things to do." oh, make me feel GUILTY! god tom, you kill me. "no! don't act like that. I'm coming with you." "good." good? that was it? "I'm sorry.." he deserved an apology. its not his fault- well, not ENTIRELY his fault..
Bad Romance?
{ Eric Brittingham }
I cant believe tom told Katie that he loved her. he's a lier! tom cant be in love with her! tom wasn't the type of man to fall in love. he was always content with a guitar and living alone in his apartment, or so i thought. i think tom is just rushing into things with this new girl. they have only been together for a MONTH! tom cant be in love! he cant! that's like me saying i am "in love" with Cheyenne. i like Cheyenne, i will admit that. She's a good person who i enjoy spending my time with, but i don't "love her"!
Bitch, Your Goin' Down
I started getting that bad-vibe from Cheyenne the moment i met her. not only did she use a bitchy tone of voice when talking to me, but calling me a "whore", "slut" and "bitch" really gave it away. i don't understand what she has against me. i did nothing wrong! all i do is mind my own business. its not like i get involved with her and Eric's relationship! i only joke around with Freddie and attach myself to tom.
"Tom, you know Cheyenne hates me.. right?" i told him. "um.. well, she doesn't HATE you.." see, even tom noticed it. "you hear what she says!" "i told you, Kayla. your not a whore." wow... really tom? i know the shit she says is not true. it just pisses me off that she can say those things about me, for no reason. "....i love you Tommy." i decided to give up. i didn't expect Tom to defend me. I'm a grown woman, i can take this bitch down on my own!
"Tom, you know Cheyenne hates me.. right?" i told him. "um.. well, she doesn't HATE you.." see, even tom noticed it. "you hear what she says!" "i told you, Kayla. your not a whore." wow... really tom? i know the shit she says is not true. it just pisses me off that she can say those things about me, for no reason. "....i love you Tommy." i decided to give up. i didn't expect Tom to defend me. I'm a grown woman, i can take this bitch down on my own!
Monday, May 2, 2011
Hot Child In The City
I realized Tom was acting aberrant when he escorted me to dinner at midnight after a show. we were exhausted and i was not in the condition for eating. all i wanted was sleep! But, Tom insisted.
Once we got to the restaurant, Tom failed at making small-talk. The over use of "uh..." and "soo.." made me believe that Tom was nervous. Why would Tom be nervous? We have been seeing each other for about a month now, not to mention the amount of intimacy we have engaged in. How could he feel nervous around me? Did he have something to announce? Was he breaking up with me? What did i do wrong? "Tom, do you have something to say?" I was now worried that i had let my thoughts make me believe that he was breaking up with me! "yes! but i uh.. should i? i should.." Tom was trying to talk himself into something. that something, i wish i knew what that something was! "are you breaking up with me? i did nothing wrong! tom, what did i do wrong?" If he was breaking up with me, he would be sorry. "no! no, of course not!" if he wasn't breaking up with me, then what did he have to say? "then.. what is it?" "you..uh.. have something in your teeth." really? tom.. "oh..right.." Maybe he was going to break up with me. He must have been too scared.
When we arrived at the apartment tom told me "i uh, have to make a call." "sure, go ahead." i told him. "in private..." "oh! right.. I'll be in the room if you need me." and with that, i went into the bedroom and shut the door. Who could Tom be calling at 2 in the morning? What was so important that he had to call Now? I distracted myself from those thoughts as i brushed out the knots in my hair. I tried to concentrate on stroking the blonde strands of hair from my head. If i think of this, i'm only going to become paranoid. "i love you." tom said, walking into the room. "what?" It was strange, to say the least. I mean- i expected something like this to be different. I expected Tom, pouring me another glass of wine wail starring into the fireplace, to ease into it. Tell me how much he admires me for who i am and all that cheesy crap that i love to hear. I was expecting the words "i love you" to come later. Not after one month of dating. "did you seriously not hear me, or do you want to hear it again so you can make fun of me?" I was speechless for a moment. I didn't know what to think. I know what to say "awww Tommy! i love you too!" i gave him a hug. "thank you." "for what?" he's seriously thanking me for loving him? "for feeling mutual." "oh.. your welcome!"
Now, isn't that just the strangest love story you have ever heard?
Once we got to the restaurant, Tom failed at making small-talk. The over use of "uh..." and "soo.." made me believe that Tom was nervous. Why would Tom be nervous? We have been seeing each other for about a month now, not to mention the amount of intimacy we have engaged in. How could he feel nervous around me? Did he have something to announce? Was he breaking up with me? What did i do wrong? "Tom, do you have something to say?" I was now worried that i had let my thoughts make me believe that he was breaking up with me! "yes! but i uh.. should i? i should.." Tom was trying to talk himself into something. that something, i wish i knew what that something was! "are you breaking up with me? i did nothing wrong! tom, what did i do wrong?" If he was breaking up with me, he would be sorry. "no! no, of course not!" if he wasn't breaking up with me, then what did he have to say? "then.. what is it?" "you..uh.. have something in your teeth." really? tom.. "oh..right.." Maybe he was going to break up with me. He must have been too scared.
When we arrived at the apartment tom told me "i uh, have to make a call." "sure, go ahead." i told him. "in private..." "oh! right.. I'll be in the room if you need me." and with that, i went into the bedroom and shut the door. Who could Tom be calling at 2 in the morning? What was so important that he had to call Now? I distracted myself from those thoughts as i brushed out the knots in my hair. I tried to concentrate on stroking the blonde strands of hair from my head. If i think of this, i'm only going to become paranoid. "i love you." tom said, walking into the room. "what?" It was strange, to say the least. I mean- i expected something like this to be different. I expected Tom, pouring me another glass of wine wail starring into the fireplace, to ease into it. Tell me how much he admires me for who i am and all that cheesy crap that i love to hear. I was expecting the words "i love you" to come later. Not after one month of dating. "did you seriously not hear me, or do you want to hear it again so you can make fun of me?" I was speechless for a moment. I didn't know what to think. I know what to say "awww Tommy! i love you too!" i gave him a hug. "thank you." "for what?" he's seriously thanking me for loving him? "for feeling mutual." "oh.. your welcome!"
Now, isn't that just the strangest love story you have ever heard?
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